The Longing of a Bride

I finally feel like I can call myself the "bride-to-be". Something about being 16 months from marriage just didn't make that feel real practical, back when we first got engaged. But here I am, only 16 days from becoming Rob's wife. *deep breath* The time has come.

"The Lord has done this, and it is marvelous to behold!" Ps. 118:23

It has been a loooooooooooooooooooong 7 months since I last saw Rob. I so often find myself spending long minutes, sometimes hours, pondering how much I miss him and long to be with him, my beloved. Yet in this, I see a strange dichotomy--and I don't like what I see.

I am redeemed by the blood of the Lamb, and I am therefore a member of His Church, also depicted as His Bride. As such, I should be overwhelmed by intense longing for Him as my Beloved. I should spend hours longing to be in His presence (and thanks be to God, He has provided access to Himself through the renting of the veil by his death!). But instead of this desire, this devotion, this longing, I have mediocre times of quiet meditation, semi-productive periods of prayer, and quick e-mail-like petitions sent up throughout the day.

My relationship with Rob has only flourished through the distance because we have both determined to devote time, energy, and love to one another and to be very intentional about protecting the time we spend with one another. This has often come at a cost to other things in our lives, namely sleep and time with our families.

**On that note, I was listening to a sermon today that spoke of Jesus's comment that we must hate father and mother, brother and sister in order to follow him. This was not a command to love our families less, but to love Jesus most. I have seen myself willing to do this in my relationship with Rob as far as putting time with him above time with family or friends. However, I am so often unwilling to do it for my Savior, my Beloved.**

I pray that in this new year as the Lord teaches me to be a wife, a friend, a lover, and a help-meet, I determine within my heart to be a better lover and friend to the One who loves me above all else. I pray that He gently leads me into a lifestyle that places Him in the place of priority in my heart, above even Rob, my (ALMOST!) husband. I pray that I learn to devote time, energy, and love to my relationship with Christ to foster and grow and protect it, regardless of the cost.

"The Spirit and the Bride say, 'Come.' He who testifies to these things says, 'Yes, I am coming soon.' Amen. Come, Lord Jesus." Revelation 22:17, 20